Love and compatibilities in astrology: what the harmonic and conflicting relationship qualities mean

heart universe astrology Ever felt a strong attraction to somebody which defies any rational reason? Ever wondered why your past relationships were so different from each other?

In astrology, every relationship is a combination of individual charts resulting in a unique connection. Such connection becomes an entity in itself, with its own specific qualities. With a person we might be bold and outgoing as a couple, with another person we might feel reserved and formal, with a third one we might talk about philosophy and psychology.

The relationship astrological report at displays a list of traits as affectionate, artistic, compassionate, clever and so on. For some users, it is not clear what the harmonic and conflicting relationship qualities mean when applied to a relationship.

Those qualities are meant to be the driving forces of the relationship itself. Technically, at 12andus we consider both the synastry chart and the composite to infer the attributes of a chosen couple.

The attributes we show for the relationship are the traits energizing the relationship itself, as a unit that goes beyond both persons. In case of a love relationship, but even in case of a friend or a business partner, we often find the relationship transcending both and transforming into something with its own life.

For instance, what does it mean in a relationship when the energetic, sensual and courageous qualities (harmonic qualities) are high, and the aggressive, greedy and impulsive (conflicting qualities) ones are also strong? In that case it appears to be a highly passionate connection, which also triggers the dark side of passion.

If either of those people still didn't fully live those traits in their individual lives, the relationship gives a chance to experience such attributes, both positive and negative ones. Relationships often start in the life of a person when the slow planets as Saturn, Uranus, Neptune or Pluto are transiting over the more personal birth planets as the Sun, Moon, Venus or Mars or in the houses connected to relationships, triggering the right attitude inside of us to meet certain kind of people.

There's a fascinating endless dance between planets, people and mutual attractions.

Many people experience exceptional connections with certain kinds of people because both natal charts combine in a peculiar way, activating relationship traits like an enzyme activates chemical reactions.

12andus' relationship report details the qualities of a relationship with any other person of your choice. Wish you a deep exploration.


    • 1Lv4_2

      I have noticed that the numbers tend to change when one person's astrological information is selected first versus another person's second. When my name is first and another person is second, one set of numbers appears for the areas of mutual attraction, but when I put Their name first, then My name second, the numbers change. So my question is, whose feelings are we seeing when one name is on top/selected first versus the next name selected second on the bottom?
      It would appear that when my name is on top the results are showing mostly the the Other person's feelings Towards Me, verses when my name is on the bottom the results seem to be geared more towards My feelings for Them. Is this how it works? If not, could you please clarify how all of this functions (specifically, why do the numbers change when I reverse the name selections when calculating a "mutual attraction" report)? Thanks.

      Additionally, I think providing the Option to not expose who your connections/"friends" are, &/or perhaps the ability to make "friends" only viewable by other "friends" would make things a lot more comfortable for some people based in certain cultures with various social perceptions regarding those who may be interested in dating. Basically, I think options to control the exposure of "friends lists" would reduce anxiety that may be experienced by both men and women who might be interested in making connections for dating more privately.

      • Ivo - 12andus founder
        Ivo - 12andus founder

        Thanks for your comment and for your valuable suggestions. I am aware of such difference and I am working on such issue. Very soon I'll give you a detailed answer.

        About the friends list, I understand your concern. Even though friends might be just friends and not potential dating users, as you say, it could generate some uncomfortable feelings in certain cultures. However, setting the possibility to see the friends list only by other friends might also make things uncomfortable (a friend who might be a potential partnerwho looking at the friends list
        might also create also some uncomfortable feelings). Maybe the safer solution might be to show only how many friends a user has, without showing the actual usernames or profiles, or, even better, let the user set his preference: show just the number of friends, show the list of friends only to other friends or show the list of friends to everybody (which might be a further level of complications both for users and for us as developers but maybe worth to make things more under control for users).

        • 1Lv4_2

          Thanks for your response and I look forward to better understanding how your system works when you have the explanations you are working on.
          In regards to the friends list, I was thinking that it would probably be a good idea to simply be able to turn on or Off the showing of friends as a user settings preference (for all the good reasons we all can certainly understand).
          As an example, a way I thought it could be done is: if I were to elect to "hide friends lists", that would mean I could Only see My own friends list, And I would not be able to see Other users' friends list, Nor could other users see mine. This way, you only see your Own friends list; no one Else sees your friends list, and your exposure to certain feelings or issues from having to witness any other users' "friends" lists while mingling in various dating scenarios could be alleviated, all with one "hide" selection as a privacy option.
          On the other side, with electing to "show friends list," everything could simply remain as it currently is.
          Basically, to keep it simple, I would make the option to show/see All (except other users who have selected Not to show Their lists) or show/see None (except to view your Own list of friends for Yourself).
          I hope this helps.
          Thanks again!

          • Ivo - 12andus founder
            Ivo - 12andus founder

            you are welcome. The areas of mutual attraction show indeed different values whether according to the "side" is calculated from. For instance if Bob calculates for the areas of mutual attraction with Alice, this will give different results than calculating the areas of Alice and Bob. To calculate those areas of mutual attraction we consider 3 main factors: the composite chart (including composite planets iin signs, composite houses, composite planets in houses, and composite aspects), the synastry chart and the planets in each others' houses. The composite chart and the planets in each others' houses information don't change whether we calculate as Bob/Alice or as Alice/Bob.

            The synastry chart aspects are different if we consider the attraction from one side of the person or from the other side. When calculating the areas of mutual attraction between Bob and Alice we consider the planets from Bob's view. In certain cases the differences can be significative. I am fixing it by giving the same values whatever the starting point, by considering both sides of the synastry aspects.

            There might be however still slight differences in the areas of mutual attraction when switching side. This happens because the calculation of the power of the synastry aspects considers also the aspects of the individual natal charts. As an example, let's consider a synastry chart where there's a trine between Bob's Mercury and Alice's Venus. If there's an aspect between Mercury and Venus in Bob's natal chart, the synastry aspect will have more power for Bob rather than Alice (if she doesn't have such aspect also), thus increasing the areas of mutual attraction influenced by such aspect (specifically, romantic, communication). This logic is applied to every synastry and even to the composite aspects, so this explains the differences.

            With the new algorithm the areas of mutual attraction and also the relationship qualities values might, and probably will change for most of the relationship reports. This might confuse the users but I think it's a better refinenent than before.

            I hope to have the changes online in a day or 2 if there isnt' any "side effect" for the changes.

            • 1Lv4_2

              Thank you; that was exactly what I needed to know! I also think it was a Good thing how you've shown the different perspectives.
              If I may suggest, perhaps you could incorporate an instruction or extra label somewhere to help users better understand what they are looking at as they calculate the reports_

              • Ivo - 12andus founder
                Ivo - 12andus founder

                Ok, I updated the calculations for the areas of mutual attraction, considering both sides and also made them more accurate. The last blog post at explains better. Thanks again for pointing to this